For weeks, months really, I’ve debated how I would return to the blog after this uneventful hiatus I’ve been on. Recently, I got an email from this basic looking white girl named Claire, and she told me how much she loved one of my posts. I felt like a celebrity for a solid 3 days, and thought to myself, “Your people need you.” So, here I am, people. You can thank Claire. Also, I’d like to thank those of you who continued to stalk me and read posts in my absence. In the 8 months I’ve been M.I.A, my blog has still had thousands of views. You guys must have been really desperate for entertainment.
My return comes just in time to close the chapter on 2016. It was a year of fuck boys, fuck ups, and lots of cool celebrities dying. Other than the blog, let’s take a look at what this year brought me, and what I’ve been up to since we last talked:
- Got a tattoo. I can’t wait to tell you guys how that came about.
- Saw a psychic who literally told me I was an angel sent from God, then she asked me why I eat so much. Accurate.
- Met a boy, and then unmet the same boy. One of the first things he said to me was, “You’re not going to write about me on your blog, are you?” My answer was no, but I also said things like, “I never do this on the first date.”
- Went from a bombshell brunette to a bronde balayaged babe thanks to my hairstylist, @HairByKrystalMarie at Radiate 60.
- Joined the nation, minus the Cincinnati Zoo, in grieving the loss of Harambe.
- Attended a Beyonce concert. Honey, let me tell you. I saw Jesus herself.
- May or may not have made out with a stripper on a party bus.
- Took a fabulous vacation to Pebble Beach, CA where I golfed, drank too much wine, and – wait no, that’s all I did there.
- Jumped on the Cubs bandwagon because, who didn’t?
- Voted in a historic Presidential Election. And, I have nothing else to say about that.
- Started Shameless on Netflix. ISO real-life Lip Gallagher. I tend to like guys with daddy issues.
- Mourned Kim Kardashian’s absence from social media. I’m still mourning.
- Didn’t lose any weight.
- Today at work I was attempting to Google the Urban Dictionary definition of “fuck boys,” and you can imagine what really showed up in the search results. (I hope you’re all Googling fuck boys right now.) By the time you read this, I’ll probably be able to add “lost my job” to the list.
So, really I haven’t been up to that much.
Although 2016 sucked, it was a year of learning and growing. I’d like to think we’re all better people for it, but we’re probably not. Good riddance.
If you’re interested in real news that happened this year, check out this review from the Chicago Tribune.